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Friday, June 17, 2011

I went to my "Happy Place" and the Twin Tornado ruined it

Today I went to the airport to collect #1 Grandmother after yet another holiday.

The airport was filled with irritatingly happy holidaymakers.  Excited to be going on holiday, relaxed and refreshed coming back from a holiday.  Whatever.  Either way, they were decidedly more relaxed than I.

Here's why :

I spent my time trying to decide if I should stop Miss2 from stealthly liberating #1 Grandfather's Smarties (her slidey eyes darting from me to him, as her hand repeatedly slithered up onto the table for more).  It was either stop her and risk unleashing her tyrant wrath upon me in a crowded public place, or ignore it and hope she burns off the sugar buzz before we get in the car to go home.

When she wasn't downing fistfuls of Smarties, she and Mstr2 were trying to run through the arrivals doors every time they opened.  The doors that very clearly say NO ENTRY.  Shame your average 2yr old can't read.

And when they weren't trying to rush Customs and Immigration, Mstr2 was attempting to pick the combination lock on a bright purple suitcase emblazoned with large pink cows, which belonged to a Japanese girl at the next table.  I swear to vodka, no exaggeration on the description.

The twin tornado ruined my most favourite place in the world.

I adore going to the airport.  If the parking wasn't such a rip off, I'd go there just for coffee, to browse the newsagency and bookshop, or to get my Red Rooster (roast chicken fast food chain in Perth.  Second only to Macca's, simply because they don't have a playground for me to dump the kids in for a few hours).

They have a bar that is open beyond standard trading hours.  That is a mega huge plus.  Although, I've never made a special trip out to there to the bar at odd hours, mostly because they don't have a playground either.

The point is, I love the airport more than anywhere - even Macca's.  I get up at all sort of ungodly hours (prior to 8am) to do the airport run for extended family, friends, casual acquaintances, neighbours, anyone whose face I vaguely recognise.  That place is my drug of choice after wine and vodka.

Awesome people watching.

Only, not today.  Today people were watching me, as I shot out of my chair every 5 seconds to grab a twin, and in return, I only had eyes for them.  I missed many heartfelt reunions, excited departures, complaints about the price of snacks and coffee.

Fantastic buzz in the air.  All electricity and excitement (Shut up, it's my happy place, ok?).

Only, not today.  Today the air was thick with stress (mine) and potential temper tantrums (mine, and Miss2's if I'd dared stop the Smarties supply; and Mstr2's if I'd continued to hamper his attempts at cracking the combination lock on the purple suitcase with the pink cows).

I've been stuck at home, holed up in the house with the twin tornado for over a week.  The weather has been lousy.  The temperature has been too cold to let the kids outside, and it's been raining half the time.  We have been virtual prisoners in our house.

I have been LIVING FOR this trip to the airport.  Seriously.  I shit you not.

Those little  bastards  darling's completely screwed up my favourite place, my one single outing for the week besides Miss5's school runs.

They will pay.  I'm not sure when, I'm not sure how, but they will pay.  Mummy loves you, but not so much when you ruin my special Happy Place.


  1. LOL , sorry to hear your outing was ruined - your poor poor thing.
    I can identify even if I haven't taken my twins to the airport - I wouldn't dare !
    My little buggas sure are an advertisement for good contraception at times....even if they were IVF.

  2. Dang that was a fail -

  3. Ha! I used to love the airport too - way before children and ridiculous security laws a friend and I used to catch the bus out there and have a coffee while chatting and watching the planes take off...

  4. the thing that I love about reading other blogs is finding out that I am NOT the only person on this planet who loves odd things. cheers to portraying your love of the airport.  I will happily follow any fellow airport buff.

  5. I love Red Rooster too. Pity about no playgrounds though.

  6. argh!
    this is why i refuse to take my 3 anywhere. it either ends up with me screaming at them, The Biz screaming at me for screaming at them.
    and the end result is everyone in tears. Which sounds remarkably like most of my mothers days.
    I have taken to adopting my ensuite as my sanctuary.

  7. I love the airport too and I could shop there to, but the parking does definitely suck! People watching is one my favourite pass times :) following from FYBF

  8. I love airports too (except for the prices).  And the human tornado controlling!

  9. I worked out that I should just go out there on Monday's when I don't have any kids to look after.  I'll have to forego the masochistic joy of inciting fear in other travellers, since I won't be walking in to the Departures hall with kids.  But, oh and misty eyed reunion viewing in peace is the pay off

  10. Seriously, the parking is what stops me going more often.  #1 Hubby works about 5mins from the airport.  I'm seriously considering having him drive the 12mins home from work to pick me up and take me there for a few hours on my kid-free Monday's.  Totally confident he won't see any issues with that....

  11. Oh. My. God. An ensuite? I am so freaking jealous.  I'm in a townhouse, so 2 of everything, but not in the ensuite sense, just one upstairs and one downstairs.  And now the twins can throw themselves over the baby gates on the stairs, I'm completely screwed - nowhere to hide.  I have hidden in the laundry cupboard before.  Seriously.  Only place nobody looks and just big enough to sit with a glass of wine.  True story.

  12. I wonder if they would consider putting one in if we started a petition?  I can fake many names to make it look impressively lengthy?

  13. I actually look for lengthy connections if I'm flying through certain airports.  Seriously.  Changi is a favourite - Hubby once found out I bypassed a 90 minute delay for a 4hr delay, so I could enjoy the airport.  He was not impressed...

  14. I've even selected the exact coffee shop I want to work at - right next to the arrivals.  Only, I don't know how to use the coffee machine.  And I haven't worked in a cafe since I was 17.  Other than that, I'm sure they'd love to hire me...

  15. I hear ya.  I had a woman of about 50 walk up to me smirking while I was in the supermarket checkout queue - she thanked me for my "loud" twins, because it had put her 19yr old daughter off kids, that she had been naively considering with her boyfriend (who she'd been with for all of 2 months).  Kind of like a contraception roadshow, right?


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