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Monday, July 18, 2011

Home Care Horror Monday : Part 8



I thank the Home Care peeps for affording me such a wealth of craptastic material.  I just don't say that often enough.

Today's issue is dedicated to cleaning.  A subject I don't claim to be an expert about, nor do I practice it regularly enough to be super good at it.  Hence my constant angst about the state of my tile grout, and finding it totally acceptable to grab one of the kids' toothbrushes to scrub it, before rinsing it off and putting it back for them to use again.  But don't worry, I haven't actually been bothered to do it yet.

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Miracle Hangers  $8.90
 This is just stupid.  STOOPID stupid.

Why?  Because it doesn't make sense.  You have 40 items of clothing on 40 hangers on a rail.  By ADDING plastic holders for your hangers, you are going to magically reduce your rail usage by approximately half.

I am going to get one of these for my Secret Santa this year.  Actually, it comes in a set of 8 so I can write off the next 8 Christmases of Secret Santa with one little purchase.  #Winning.

The Miracle is that they paid to print this item in so many catalogues.  Don't you think the model looks uncomfortable?  She's probably thinking she should fire her agent for booking such an embarrassing gig.  She will now forever be tied to the Miracle Hanger.  Career fail.

Please note, I did not go for a stupidly easy blonde joke, about how she was the only one dazzled by the product and prepared to be in the photo.  *Ahem*

Home Care Horror Rating : 3/5
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Track Cleaning Brush  $3.90

So hands up if you regularly clean the tracks of your sliding doors and windows?  #1 Hubby occasionally  rarely  puts the super-sucker narrow nozzle on the vacuum and slides it along to pick up the dead fly carcasses before the twins find them and eat them.  But that is all.

This thing is super tiny, so you can look forward to spending a LOT of time on your hands and knees, inching your way along your sliding door tracks, sweeping away dust and other loose particles.

It does has a massive 17cm handle to keep your knuckles away from the tracks.  Seriously.  They're kind and thoughtful like that - so you can focus on the back-breaking pain of kneeling on the tiles, shuffling along at a rate of 2cm every 5 minutes, vigorously brushing the dirt from your sliding door tracks, without fear of your princessy knuckles coming into contact with the tracks.  Heaven forbid.

I thank the vodka gods for such genius and fancy modern inventions as the broom, for it's handle - substantially longer than 17cm, so my knuckles are most definitely not going to scrape the tracks - and it's squillions of bristles to get the job done much quicker than the 40 or 50 bristles on this teeny tiny device.

Home Care Horror Rating : 4/5
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Furniture Repair Kit  $7.90
The first sentence of the description calls these crayon-shaped.  Me thinks that may be because they are crayons!

My kids would love these.
Unfortunately, we do not own all beige/brown/white/black furniture.  We live in a world of colours.  So the kids may as well have these for drawing since my rogue coloured furniture would refuse to co-operate and blend in with these 'myeh' colours.

Even if you did have furniture these colours, what do you think the chances are, that your furniture would exactly match the shade of any one of these crayons?  Pretty slim.  You could try it anyway, and then your furniture would simply look drawn on, and not scratched.  So much more house-proud that way, no?

Home Care Horror Rating : 5/5

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