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Friday, August 3, 2012

FFS!? Friday: Featuring wine and Justin Bieber

By 8:40am last Friday, I had already started this week's FFS!? Friday post. FFS.

I spent last Thursday night harassing Miss6 to learn about mice, so she could wow the crowd with her assigned Show & Tell News topic last Friday.

#1Hubby bleeted something about helping, so I sat him and Miss6 down in front of the Google Gods while I made dinner.  If I hadn't intervened, Miss6 would've been wowing the class with stories about how mice die, what animals they eat, and how many babies they have. FFS

Can you guess how popular I would've been with Miss6's teacher and the other parents if I'd sent Miss6 to school to talk about those shocking facts in a class full of 5 and 6 year olds? FFS

#1Hubby was removed from homework duty on his first attempt, so now I do dinner and homework because I'm MOFO SuperMama (able to cook and educate at the same time, capable of leaping lego buildings in one single bound, faster than a speeding projectile/texta/vomit - you get the picture). FFS. 

Not only are mice incredibly boring, FFS, but it turns out I was a week early, and now I have to convince her to do it again today. FFS.

While focussing on her week early news item last week, I totally forgot to hand in her homework for the week. FFS.

School closed early on Friday. Crazy early. Before lunch time. FFS.

Same again on Monday. FFS.

I'm still living the Olympic Nightmare. FFS.

Miss3 was being super cute at swimming lessons, and so I had a ladylike chuckle (read: unflattering donkey-like guffaw/brey)...right at the exact moment another mother who was walking past me almost slipped on the wet floor.  Other mother assumed I'd laughed at her, and shot me the death stare for the rest of the lesson. FFS.

But really, it was a total "two-for" in the words of my girl Jessica Simpson.  I totally enjoyed the half-splits of the slippery Mumma as much as Miss3 bouncing around in the water.

In case you missed it, I posted an awesome Wine Giveaway on Wedneseday.  Unfortunately, I forgot to include the witty images I had carefully trawled the internet to pilfer. FFS.

So here they are for you to enjoy completely out of context now:

I had to write a work article that referenced Justin Bieber.  FFS.

It included watching a number of Bieber clips, and towards the end the subliminal brain-washing was clearly working, as I found him ever so slightly attractive and talented. FFS.

I had to learn how to spell Bieber. FFS.


  1. Beiber! Definite FFS

    Glad you enjoyed the half splits of the slippery mumma - too funny!

  2. FFS indeed! Just those last few would have done my head in. If you want a laugh at the Biebs's expense, google Justin Bieber Sistine Chapel.

  3. Did you say Wine Giveaway??  *off I toddle*

  4.  And it is some mighty tasty wine at that! Good luck, God speed, all that stuff!

  5.  Oh bless....the pretty ones are never the brightest, heh.

  6.  I can't help but write Bei instead of Bie....mofo spell checker never picks it up either. I had to manually go through and make my eyes even more hurty reading his name again and again checking for errors.

    Yes I know I could've added the correct spelling to my spell checker...but I don't plan on EVER writing his name again, so it was totally a principal thing.

    Now I have to go Google if I've used the correct principal/principle.....FFS

  7. I love how the lady wants her missing details on wine cartons and not just wine bottles. It could only be worse if they were flagons.

  8. What the hell do you do for a living ??!!!  I've come to intervene: Justin Bieber is don't find him attractive or talented...FFS! :)

  9. Oh bugger about the mice homework...hubby didnt do that on purpose so that he gets out of homework all of the time??
    And gee I love the idea of having my photo on a wine bottle, just hope I never need to use it!!

  10. Justin Beaver (that's what my girls call him) is all the FFS you needed. The mice and homework were the cherries on the FFS cake of Effness xxxxxx

  11.  I am still singing "If I was your boyfriend..." in my head. I'm disturbing myself.

  12.  He probably did - I only found out about 8 years after the fact, that he deliberately hung the washing on the line all doubled over and messy (not to mention in a totally non-symetrical pattern!) so that I would tell him never to hang the washing out again.

  13.  I write for a PR firm about Social Media. Sadly, The Bieb is big on social media. It was much more fun when Charlie Sheen was still on Twitter. Sigh.

    Don't even get me started on bloody One Direction...argh!

  14.  It actually was wine bottles on the original quote, but being me, I changed it to cartons.  So much more realistic!

  15. I still don't know one single song that JB sings. Thank Jeebus! Totes would have cracked up the lady slipping in the puddle too, hilarious! I once saw a jogger running down Canning hwy thinking she was god's gift to Nike until she stacked it big time, must have done 3 somersaults on the pavement. This was 12 years ago and I still almost wet myself laughing when I think about it. 


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