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Wednesday, March 20, 2013

19 year olds, lady bits, and ego crushing

While at the shopping centre yesterday, a somewhat questionable and completely shit faced young guy came up to me.

“Are they real?”

No clue what he was talking about, I stupidly asked….

As soon as he smirked I knew what he was talking about.

When did it become socially acceptable for a 19-ish year old ‘kid’ to approach a clearly *slightly* older female and question the origin of her lady bits?

Ironically, said lady bits have dropped almost 2 sizes since I lost all the weight, so I have been feeling a bit dubious about them.  The more recent up side is that, as my post-surgery tummy swelling goes down, it does make my lady bits look bigger just by simple visual ratio of boob to flatter gut.  #winning!

Just when I was feeling a bit chuffed with myself regarding my interaction with the off-his-face teen, he had to screw it all up and follow up with another question.

“So like, you're a total MILF, yeah.  How old are you, 40-something?”

Motherfucker….I am 34.

To which he cracked up laughing.

Before moving on to the next lady (one of grandmotherly age range) and asking her the same questions.

Ego now deflated, considering a radical face lift, I left.

Teenagers these days.  No clue and no respect.  

Now excuse me while I go blue rinse and perm.


  1. I am so immature I laughed the whole way through!! Too funny!!

  2. That little brat! Doesn't he know the first rule of talking to women is to always understate their age by at least ten years!

  3. What a cheek! Oh well, good luck to him. With brilliant (and hilarious) pick up lines like that, he's going to need it!

  4. I'd still take it as a compliment. Teenaged boys have absolutely no idea about age. Even less so when they're off their face.

  5. Gosh I so would love to hear what the Grandmother Lady said to the very rude teenager boy!!
    Still shaking my head that he had the guts to ask the question - either he was really stupid or off his face (or both?)
    Kids - what is our world coming to.
    Hey at least he noticed you had them, shame he wasn't nicer about asking :)

  6. Hmmmm...I think I would have come back with a 'younger then yo mumma ' joke ...or is that not cool...gawd kids these days, I think this is why I avoid eye contact with anyone under


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