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Friday, March 1, 2013

FFS!? Friday : This week coming to you sans jocks




That's right my friends....we are jock-less, jock-free, sans pants, bits and pieces flapping in the breeze, as it were.

You may recall last week was a FFS!?-less FFS!? Friday, so I've had to hold this sucker in for a whole extra week.

Oh the double meanings abound...


Last Tuesday the Twin Tornado FINALLY attended their first full day of school.

We survived the sadistic phasing in period and finally clawed our way to the light of day that is full days (No FFS!?), albeit only twice a week (FFS!?).

When we got home from school, I had the kids take their uniforms off so I could wash them.

Mstr4 promptly dropped his shorts and started waving his boy bits around.

"No mate, just your shorts.  You can leave your jocks on."

"What jocks Mummy?"

"The ones under your shorts."

"I'm not wearing any jocks Mummy"

"What?!?"

"I'm. Not. Wearing. Any. Jocks.....Mummy"

Now some would blame the parent, who should've been paying some semblance of attention to a pair of 4 year olds getting dressed, particularly for their first full day of school.

But in my defence, I can assure you I was otherwise occupied by far more pressing issues.

I think.

And I don't mean Facebook.

It was Ebay and an auction was ending.

Anyway, as a result of how super awesome his first full day of school was, Mstr4 is now deigning to wear his jocks. FFS!?

Like, ever.  FFS!?

Miss4 has been observing his delight with much interest, and I'm positive we are days away from her joining in the pantslessness. FFS!?

I fight/wrestle him into jocks, lest his boy bits pop out at some inopportune moment.  Like story time, crunch 'n' sip or on the monkey bars. FFS!?

Yesterday he came home from school, stood in front of me and dropped his shorts, grinning like a madman and waving his boy bits at me, proclaiming "Look Mummy!  No jocks!"

I found them in his lunchbox.

FFS!? and also WTF?

I very matter of factly pointed out that he was not Britney Spears, and therefore he should not be flashing his bits and pieces to others. FFS!?

The only jocks he'll even consider maybe possibly wearing at the moment are Batman jocks.  So off I went and bought a pack.

Except it wasn't Batman he wanted, it was Spiderman. FFS!?

So then I went and bought a pack of those, because I'd already opened and washed the Batman ones that are now being shunned at the back of his underwear drawer. FFS!?

I fully expect the teacher has realised my son has attended Kindergarten sans jocks, and no doubt he's on some special attention watch list as a result. FFS!?

And if all that fails, I'm going to get him these, just to screw with his super hero obsession

 


20 comments:

  1. In his lunchbox made me spit my coffee out!! What is it with boys and being naked? My 2 are never happier than shower time when they run around being nudey rudeys!! I am sure te teaschers see worse than a child who takes his undies off and puts them in his lunchbox!! Hows things? Did you get that sponge bath??!!

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    1. Here's hoping they see worse. Otherwise I'll expect him to be paired with the kid with recurring head lice. Shudder.

      No sponge bath. Can you beleive it? I feel completely ripped off...

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  2. Glad the boss is still downstairs so he didn't hear my splutter as I read this post !!!! As always - your family provides great relief on a Friday !
    How are you feeling ? I hope that the op was a TOTAL success !
    Have a fantastic Friday !
    Me

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    1. I feel like we could be the unKardashian's...

      It was a massive success - but don't even get me started on the mother of all lycra suits I have to wear for 6 weeks. Cruel and torturous and impossible to take on and off...

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  3. Thanks for the giggle, what a character he sounds like!!

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    1. That's the nice way of putting it! He's lucky he's Mummy's boy sometimes...

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  4. A boy needs his superhero jocks. Even now my 24 year old still wears them (admittedly in a much larger size than when he was 4). Last year he was wearing them when he had to punch his way out of a toughened glass window to escape a fire at work (no joke - broken hand, stitches and staples for all the lacerations) and he attributes his undies to giving him the power to escape. I say let him have his Batman undies - you never know when he may need them.

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    1. You've convinced me. He can have all the super hero undies under the sun. As long as he actually wears them! Preferably on his backside, not on his head (whole other story).

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  5. LOL!! I think some little boys just love our horrified expressions when they flash their dangly bits at inappropriate moments. My littlest boy (who coincidentally has also just started prep) is a demon for it. He's forever getting out of the shower and doing nudie runs through the lounge room, much to the horror of the Mr 10 and Mr 8 who are much more conservative about bits these days!Rach xx

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    1. I blame the fathers. Clearly they are spending too much time waving it around all over the place, and the sons are learning from them. Certainly not the respectable mothers....

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  6. I had such a laugh. Maybe you could tell the story of an older primary school student I taught who was doing leaderball practise and may have split his pants bending down only to realise he had no jocks on!

    Lets say everyone knew!

    But I have to say what a character if he can think to take them off at school and put them in his lunchbox. Most kids aren't clever enough to do that!

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    1. Ooh, that made me cringe for the poor thing! That will be my boy in a couple of years when they start leaderball for their sports carnival. Mark my words.

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  7. Bahahaha! I got my little boy changed at the end of a wintery Tasmanian day (at preschool) only to find he'd pulled his trackies up over his PJ bottoms and had been wearing them ALL DAy.

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    1. That there is a survival mechanism. Tasmania is COLD! Smart kid to keep his warm PJ's on!

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  8. My kids HATE knickers too - and my daughter went to Kindy without any and I didn't know until dinner!! I look forward to reading your FFS every week!
    BTW how are you feeling? Am I a total weirdo or were you going through a big procedure last week?! Hope you're doing well if so, if not then please tell me off - Em xx

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    1. Clearly I am a slightly more attentive mother than you, given I noticed just before dinner time with my kid. Albeit because he disrobed. But still, the point is, I think I have you beat by at least 20 minutes.

      Am feeling much better now thanks. I had a 'radical abdominoplasty' (I had said massive abdominoplasty, but my surgeon told me it's actually a radical one - I feel so super 80's cool now that I'm all "radical"). Essentially, a massive, monster, full on tummy tuck. Expect to see me at your local beach in a teeny, tiny string bikini when the swelling goes down....not.

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  9. oh MY gosh!! How on earth did they get in the lunchbox...actually I don't think I want to know the answer to that one :)
    one of our sons used to sit on the Potty with his favorite undies and proudly say "finish" - with his undies still on...yeah we had to hide his favorite so that he would use the toilet the right way.
    Kids - gotta love them :)

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    1. That's my question - how did he get them off and pack them away without one of the teachers seeing?

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  10. Oh my goodness this is hilarious! My son (now nine) loves to go jock free. His kindy was four morings a week so we had to make a deal with him that Friday was jock free day. He took great delight in announcing to everyone and anyone who would listen that, "today is Friday so I don't have to wear any jocks!" He still tries to sneak in a jock free day now and he's in year four!

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    1. Oh I love it - our local radio station used to have a "pants free Friday" thing every week - clearly your son was ahead of his time!

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