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Friday, May 10, 2013

FFS!? Friday : Moustache cultivation

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Imma gonna let my mo grow because it compliments my red neck image, y'all.

I swear this is my last swimming lessons related post.

It's not actually a FFS!? Friday about the swimming lessons as such.

It's about my personal grooming, or lack thereof, being exposed at swimming lessons.

You see, as I arrived each day for The Feral Threesome's lessons, two school parents were waiting for their kids to finish.

I'd sit on the bench between the Mum of one of Miss7's school friends and the Dad of another.

It afforded me a quick 5 minutes of adult conversation between their kids finishing and mine starting.  No FFS!?

Unfortunately, I may have given the impression that I'd let myself go over the school holidays, as I'd been growing a slight lady mo.  FFS!?

I am convinced they were both talking to my mo and not the rest of my face.  FFS!?

I'm certain this is how ladies with big boobs must feel.  Kind of.  FFS!?

I'm by no means pro-mo, it's just that I was holding off on waxing until right before we went to Singapore.

I figured I'd only be hiding out at home during the school holidays so it wouldn't matter.

If nothing else, I could keep the kids busy combing and plaiting it as an extra special school holidays activity.

I certainly didn't expect to be within close personal range of people I knew.  FFS!?

I predict the entire school will know of my flavour saver by the time I return to doing the school run today.  FFS!?

Despite the fact that I have never ever allowed it to grow in the past, and never plan to again, this will become what I'm known for around school.

This and the fact that last year I spent an entire school term asking the kids to bring booze to school for me (it was for a raffle...but still).  FFS!?

I will be the alcoholic moustached lady.  FFS!?

I wonder if that would earn me a spot in Cirque De Soleil?

At the very least I'm certain it would qualify me as one of the "People of Walmart".

Don't even get me started on my accompanying mono brow....FFS!?


  1. You need to change your tagline to alcoholic moustached lady, could there be a more perfect description!!

  2. If you drink enough alcohol, I'm sure you won't care about what people think. And if you drink enough alcohol I'm sure the judgemental mothers will be judging things other than your grooming.

    1. So true. I could let it all hang out and give them a disapproving gossip feast. I would be like the public service to other school mothers who are terrified of being judged. I am such a giver.

  3. Call the Victorian travelling sideshows now! Added bonus of seeing the world.

    1. This is true. And everyone would expect me to be drunk, so there'd be no shock or judgement. Brilliant!

  4. It’s really a great post..I would like to appreciate your work and I am going to recommend it to my friends.


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