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Monday, July 1, 2013

I'll take one in every colour


Comfortable sports bra with polyurathane bladder holds 25 ounces (an entire 750ml bottle) of your favourite beverage.

Long drinking tube with easy-to-use on/off valve to control the flow

Shut the front gate.

Have you seen these?

It will give me the appearance of a far more generous cleavage.

At least until I have my first few power sucks.

I do hope the sides drain evenly, lest I look lopsided and uneven?

I'm all about the symmetry.

It will keep my red wine at a nice room / body temperature.

However, I'm not sure how to tackle white wine.  You see, I'm all class and enjoy a few cubes of ice in my white.

Where to place the ice?  Or do I just tape a couple of the kids' school lunch box ice packs on the outside to at least chill my white wine (and further enhance my assets even when the bra has been sucked dry of its contents)?

Will this bad boy maintain the fizz in my bubbly?

Literally, not metaphorically.

I can't tell you how excited I am about this.

This is about the closest I've ever come to bona fide exercise attire.

I love that Amazon has listed them new from $29.95...and 2 used from $27.57...



Did someone dare return theirs, unsatisfied with the results?

I hope they washed it before returning it.

I want one in each colour.

For real.

And maybe a catheter so that I never need to get up from the lounge.

The best thing to happen to wine since the cask was invented.

Screw top bottles come in a close 3rd.


  1. What colours do they come in? Red? White? Pink champagne?

  2. PMSL as always !!! Lucky I am the only one in the office right now otherwise I would probably be getting some strange looks !
    Have the best day and I hope you don't have to wait too long for your deliveries (of the neew bra or the wine !!)

  3. That is BRILLIANT. I would imagine my husband would be very disappointed as he saw my rack deflating as I got more and more drunk, though.

    1. Which could be a good thing. After a bottle of wine I simply want to go to sleep. Way to disappoint/deter hubby at the perfect time!

  4. I note that those young models must have recently acquired their racks as they have yet to develop their wine cask around the middle.

  5. Yes - I would rather carry a nice high wine rack than a keg. I am also wondering if there is some kind of male equivalent?

    1. Who cares! I'm all about my own simple and easy wine consumption. Hubby can fend for himself and drink like a heathen (via glass or bottle)

  6. Oh I've hear about these! Only a male would have invented this damn thing. If I wore it I would look very suss, like I'd had an instant boob job because I hardly have any to start with. Unfortunately (or fortunately) I'd much prefer to drink my wine from a glass and perhaps stash the bottle in my handbag (oh, well it's my nappy bag these days!)

    Check out Mummy Mondays!

    1. I have to admit, I am totally curious, and if they are ever reduced on sale I am grabbing one! If for nothing else than the comedy value of trying to drain one side more than the other.

      I found a pram brilliant for stashing covert wine. Nobody ever thinks to check the pram basket!

  7. How fantastic! Love it - and love your hilarious post, I think the lunch icebricks strapped to the front would be a great look - thanks for the giggle

    1. Thank you - I am counting that as your vote for white wine with ice blocks. Stay tuned!

  8. I find that someone markets this stuff astounding...thought went into the idea, money went into making it...and this is what we, the human race, comes up with....on the other hand, I could kart around a magnum...

    1. Exactly! Who has the money and thinks "that is a brilliant idea, I'll mass produce that!"....


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