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You may recall my
gloaty/whiney post about having completed the next 12 months of
Christmas and birthday present shopping for The Feral Threesome back in
July.
To update you - Thus far…
I
have not forgotten where I hid the presents, as I previously have and
worried I may do again, given how early they were purchased and hidden.
No FFS!?
The
kids did not find the presents mere days after I hid them, as they have
in the past and I worried they may do again, given my lack of hiding
places, creativity, and effort. No FFS!?
I didn’t have the chance to forget where I’d put them.
The kids took slightly longer than a few days to find them.
Last
week Miss4 came downstairs and asked who the scooter wrapped in the
garbage bags inside the suitcase at the back of my wardrobe underneath
the boxes was for…. FFS!?
Because, you know, it’s totally normal for her to go into my wardrobe.
To a suitcase at the back.
That sits underneath a pile of boxes.
And after pulling all that down and out of the way, of course she would open the suitcase.
And pull out all the garbage bags.
And find the boxed up bloody scooter that Santa was going to give her.
Mofo FFS!?
The kid has never been interested in going into my wardrobe before.
She
has seen the suitcase there when watching me hang clothes up (read:
blindly tossing #1Hubby’s shit inside the closet to later feign surprised while claiming that they must’ve slipped off their hangers).
Never has she ever expressed any sort of curiosity or interest in the suitcase.
Why would she?
BECAUSE SHE HAS PRESENT RADAR. FFS!?
Of
course the slimy little mini mofo had to call her brother and sister in
to inspect the bounty. And so the other 2 scooters were discovered. FFS!?
She didn’t even come to me first, allowing me the opportunity to negotiate and bribe her to keep her mouth shut. FFS!?
So
now I’ve had to madly pull out all the birthday and Christmas gifts and
rearrange them so that Santa gives them all something else. FFS!?
Otherwise,
Miss4 (by far the smartest of the family) would’ve easily equated Santa
to us and thus blown my annual enjoyment trying to stay awake longer
than them on Christmas Eve, so that I can eat a giant carrot (they
ALWAYS choose the biggest bloody carrot in the bag to leave out for the
reindeer), drink the disgusting beer (why can’t Santa have a nice
chilled glass of Semi Sav Blanc???), and then eat half a stale choc chip
cookie that goes fabulously with flat disgusting beer and shit loads of
carrot (why no Triple Cream Brie to go with the SSB?). FFS!?
I know I've said it before, but seriously yo - where's my parent of the year award? FFS!?
LOL - your kids just crack me up !!!!!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with keeping the other presents hidden - if you manage to do that you definitely deserve a MOTY award.
Have the best day trying to find those hiding places that you will remember and they won't find !
Me
See what being organised does!! I lost all present hiding spots when we rebuilt our house and as nothing is sacred around here hiding stuff will be hard this year. Lucky my eldest 2 are so naughty Santa is probably not going to show up!!
ReplyDeleteThats why I try and shorten the time between present buying and present giving. Santa never hides presents for me though- I know because I check!
ReplyDeleteDon't all kids do that? I know I did as a kid. My kids did it. And after a while I told them if they wanted to get a surprise for Christmas then they'd stay out of my wardrobe. So they knew where the loot was and they knew the consequences of snooping.
ReplyDeleteOh man that blows! There's something to be said for the last minute Christmas present dash.
ReplyDeletePresent radar! Bahahahaha! But seriously, it doesn't surprise me and no guessing where she gets it from. Look how cluey her mother is!
ReplyDeleteThis situation does get better as they get older when all they want for Christmas is hard cold cash!
ReplyDeleteI just have a very nosey daughter - she gets it from her dad - I think I'll have to hide things in the roof - it's one place she can't get to - thanks for the laugh, sucks your stash is no longer a surprise
ReplyDelete