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Monday, December 23, 2013

Career choices

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The school year finished last week, which means that the Twin Tornado commence full time schooling next year.  Hooray for no more 2 days a week plus a half day that is actually only 2 hours.  I've spent more time fighting for one of the few parking spots for the various staggered pick up / drop off / don't forget the older child times, than the twins actually spent in school this past year.

It also means I'm starting to consider what I can do for work while they're at school.

I've given it some very serious consideration.

After all, it will be my first steps towards a career that can both sustain my love of Bali holidays, and also help pay for three times the gymnastics lessons, swimming lessons, karate etc. etc.

I've narrowed it down to five options:

Business class travel reviewer

Or any class at all.  Because everyone has to start somewhere.

My experience as a travel agent gives me total credibility here, despite the fact that I never once scored a customer fancy enough to enquire about business class travel options.

I am ready to spend my workdays travelling the globe, experiencing and judging the finest in luxury travel.

All in a totally selfless manner, intended to provide the public with a genuine and impartial view of competing luxury travel service providers with a side of ner ner, look at me.

Wine and Vodka quality control

Ok I admit, it's hard to sell this one as a serious career option.

Like a wine critic who also tests vodka cocktails but has nothing backing up her opinions beyond a sincere affection for the products and years of dedicated experience.

Would you not secretly like to know which cask wine really is the best bang for your buck?  Secure in your bulk purchase because someone has been rigorously testing the goods.

George Clooney's wife

This is a job.  For real.  It's been a long running vacancy that no starlet has been able to fill, try as they might.

I am totally the woman for the job.  Complete with ready-made family.

Or not.  I can start again.

Professional gambler.  In Vegas.  Always winning.

Drawing the crowds, enjoying all the freebies afforded a high roller.

People will come from far and wide to watch me beat the 1c pokie machines while sipping complimentary cocktails.

I will only stop to go watch Britney flash her bits from the VIP section, while my personal security cordon off and guard my pokie machine.

Like professional poker players but on the 1 cent pokies instead.

Angelina Jolie's slightly more attractive, wealthier and just as philanthropic and charismatic, but otherwise unknown sister.

Self explanatory.

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Decisions, decisions

So I'm having trouble choosing between these five career paths.

And it's not like high school where there's a tree hugging middle aged careers advisor to direct me on the path of career enlightenment.

It's all on me to choose.

And if I can't, you may well hear me through a loud speaker asking "Would you like fries with that?" - my back up plan.  For an extra $5 I will slip some vodka in your slushie.


  1. I think you should go with the George Clooney's Wife option. He'd be lucky to have you. And your progeny. And your other spouse.

    1. EXACTLY, right? I feel like he'd kind of owe me. Because, you know, I'm bringing so much to the table with the relationship.


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