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Monday, December 30, 2013

Self serve - living the dream

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My very first career aspiration in Kindergarten was to become a house wife.

My parents were super psyched to hear me announce this in front of the entire school and all of the parents, while my classmates declared their intentions to become Wonder Woman, a fireman, a hairdresser and the like.

In my youth I dreamed of being a check out chick.

True story.

I have always aimed high.

When it came time for high school, I was sent to a fancy pants all-girls boarding school, because our small country town didn't have a local high school.

The #1Grandparents forked out a small fortune for my high school education, with dreams of having a refined lady with professional career aspirations and multiple university acceptances returned to their doorstep 5 years later.

I finished high school swearing less than some.

I graduated with my high school certificate.

I got in to Tafe.

But only after my continued, burning desire to be a check out chick or work at Macca's were denied by my substantially less financially flushed parents.

They totally crushed my dreams of scanner guns, deep fryers, Eftpos machines, and showing off my speedy keyboard skills on a till.

Never to be that voice over the loud speaker "Price check, aisle 3".

So I went to Tafe and got my yawnsville generic Diploma of Business Management.

All the while, dreaming of Kmart and eyeing the Woolworths checkout operator with envy while they scanned my weekly groceries.

Over the past few years I've been crazy excited to find self serve checkouts gradually rolled out at the likes of K Mart and Big W.

I now go out of my way to shop at their stores where I can do my own checkout.  It is the highlight of my shopping trip.

And just when I thought it couldn't get any better, I couldn't get any more of a checkout buzz....

My local Woolworths, where I do the bulk of my shopping, has installed a self serve area.


This is a pinnacle moment for me.

It will be marked down as a defining highlight of my life.

While other people go to the self serve checkouts with a few random items, I rock up with an overflowing trolley.

Staff have rushed over to point out standard checkout queues that may be more convenient for me.

I laugh.

I scoff.

I continue to relish scanning every single item myself.

I compete with other self serve customers and even the real checkout operators, scanning my items as fast as or faster than they are serving their customers.

It's a total adrenalin rush.

I'm not kidding, the only way you could get me back to the regular checkout is if George Clooney was operating it.

Finally, I am living the dream.

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Nailed it


  1. It's such a rush, isn't it?!! Until you go shopping with your husband and he decides to 'help' you by trying to find all the barcodes before handing you each of the items. Or, worse, he tries to scan it himself and repeatedly forgets to place the item in the bagging area.Or scans something twice. All I can say is that I had a happier marriage before they brought in self-serve check outs.

    1. OMG don't even get me started on unwanted help. Miss8 is as mad for the scanner as I am. We are like a couple of girls having a slap fights as we try push each others hands out of the way.

  2. Well - I now avoid the Supermarket "self Checkout" as I am THAT MUMMY who inadvertently uses the "SPEEDY" self service checkouts as a teaching opportunity to my two little boys (much to the severe annoyance of the shoppers in the queue behind me) "Look Alex, scan it and put it in that bag over there" .... hmmm - worked really well until 2 year-old Superdude pushed over a display of Tic Tacs (man, those little plastic boxes can be really loud as they're smashing over the supermarket floor). Girls - go live the Self Serve dream. Me and my little Superdudes will go and sweet talk George Clooney (I'll take a "Price Check, Aisle 3" any day...)


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