I'll take one in every colour
After 2 weeks of school holidays I am completely over the constant whining of MUUUUMMM! FFS!?
Each child has a niche. They either take turns endlessly whining MUUUUMMM! or they do it all at once in a totally non-melodic way. FFS!?
Mstr4's thing is food.
He's spent the past 2 weeks eating for Australia. Almost every time he's opened his mouth, it's been to whine for food. FFS!?
At one point - immediately after eating his lunch - he was all MUUUUMMM (that word again) I'M HUUUNNGGGRRRRRYYYYYYY....
At my wits end and with nothing but packets of pasta and tins of tomatoes in my pantry, I told him to go eat the raw spaghetti if he was soooo huuunnnngggggrrrryyyyy!
And he did.
Half a packet before I caught him.
The only single time he listens to me. FFS!?
There goes dinner. FFS!?
Miss4 has been all about the close body contact - as in....
MUUUUMMM CAN I LICK YOUR FACE?....NO?....OK I WILL.....*slurp*
MUUUUMMM CAN I TOUCH YOUR NOZZIE?.....*insert finger up my nose before waiting for a reply*
MUUUUMMM CAN I SIT ON YOUR HEAD (while laying in bed)?....*insert perfectly timed fart*
Such a gem. I best enrol her in deportment classes immediately if there's to be any hope of her turning into some semblance of a lady, lest she never ever pair up with a boy (please let it be one of Britney's boys, please let it be one of Britney's boys), and instead spend the rest of my/her days living at home and farting on my head. FFS!?
As for Miss7, well she's been all woe is me these holidays, so her whines are extra nasal and desperate....
MUUUUMMM I'M SOOOO BORED! WHAT? (read/draw/paint/ride bike/play with toys/play game/any-freaking-thing) NO! I CAN'T DO THAT!? OMG MUUUUMMM!!!
MUUUUMMM MISS4 IS LOOKING AT ME! MAKE HER STOP! DON'T LOOK AT ME *insert bitch slap fight between the loving sisters*
MUUUUMMM I'M BORED AND MAKE THE TWINNIES STOP IT! WHAT? EVERYTHING!
She's really quite delightful. I swear.
You'd think, given my lack of immediate action to fix whatever is irritating them, they'd be all over #1Hubby when he gets home from work, in the hope of more satisfactory resolutions.
But no, it's as if he's not there. As if he's invisible to them. Because they'd rather climb all over me and scream in my ear while I'm in the toilet than bother their father on the lounge. FFS!?
Thinking I was incredibly clever, I threatened them with zero giftage from the US if they whined MUUUUMMM at me one more time.
Displaying their superior smarts, they immediately switched to GEORGIAAAAA. FFS!?